Jim Rohn famously said that “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” And you can understand why. The people you around undoubtedly influence your values, your beliefs, and what you choose to spend your time doing. These are also the people most likely to hold you to account, provide support, and encourage you towards your goals. In short, if you’re around people who inspire you to dig deeper and discover more, chances are you’ll grow faster than you would around people who subconsciously hold you back. Maybe this is why it’s said that your network equals your net worth. So if your social circle is an indicator of your success, it follows that your relationship-building skills can give you an edge. In short, if you can communicate with anyone and cultivate rapport with the right people, you’ll be able to accelerate your best self path. And not just in terms of your goals. Good communication skills will influence all areas of your life - from your intimate relationships, to your hobbies, finances, business, career, and friendships. Which begs the question - how can you talk with anyone? How can you strike up meaningful discussion and proactively build the type of connections that can transform your life? Here are seven techniques to try. 1. Ask open-ended questions Good conversation doesn’t feel stilted. Instead, it flows effortlessly as the people involved feel comfortable sharing and talking. Open-ended questions are a must if you want to create this kind of experience. These are questions that often begin with the words how, what, and why. For example: • How did you end up doing the work you do now?• What’s your biggest achievement to date?• Why do you care about this? Open-ended questions invite lengthier responses. They also give people the space to explore their answers and share their stories. This is in comparison to closed-questions that simply require a YES or NO answer. Ask questions that invite people to open up and share more of who they are, and see where the conversation leads. You’ll likely be surprised at what you discover. 2. Make eye contact There’s something about the human eye… they even say it’s the doorway to the soul! Perhaps that’s why eye contact can feel difficult. When you look at someone in the eyes, you really see someone [and they feel seen in return]. That level of connection can feel uncomfortable. But it also shows that you’re listening. Make good eye contact and you subtly communicate to the person ou’re speaking with that you’re interested in what they have to say. That you’re giving that person your attention. That you’re not simply paying lip-service to the conversation, but you’re genuinely engaged. In this way, eye contact can strengthen your connection together and help take the conversation further than it might otherwise have gone. 3. Listen to understand, not to speak! When you speak to other people, are you listening to understand… Or are you listening to speak? The approach you take will have a big impact on the connection you build and how much the other person is willing to share with you. Here’s why… Someone who’s listening to speak won’t be so interested in what the other person has to say. Instead, they’ll be looking out for their opportunity to say what they think and what happened to them. In turn, they’ll protect their own life and experiences onto the stories being shared and as a result, may misinterpret some of the information or overlook key details that could have been explored further. They’ll also see pauses as an opportunity to speak - not as a reflection point for the other person. If you listen to speak, don’t be surprised if the person you’re speaking with doesn’t feel truly seen and eventually shuts down. But speak to understand, and you change the dynamics. Instead of rushing to share your own experiences, you reflect back what you’ve heard. You ask questions to deepen your understanding. You make confirmations that show you’re truly listening. When you’re listening to understand, you also become more aware of the non-verbal signals too. You become much more astute at detecting what isn’t being said. This leads to a much deeper understanding of the person you’re spending time with. Show up for other people in this way, and notice how people are willing to trust you more. You’ll also find they may be willing to share a lot more with you too. 4. Have a great conversation opener in your pocket How do you kick-start a meaningful conversation with someone? For many people, the default is “what do you do?” This feels safe enough and it invites people to talk about their work, but does it really help you get to know someone? Or are you simply falling into the trap of defining someone by what they do? Years ago I read a book about conversation that made me question this conversation starter. It suggested that I swapped “what do you do?” with “what do you spend most of your time doing?” It’s a subtle difference, that transforms the conversation you get into. That’s because “what do you spend most of your time doing?” gives someone the space to talk about their hobbies and their passions. This question also doesn’t create an awkward standstill if someone doesn’t have a job! Other questions to explore include, “What makes your heart sing?” or “What’s your favorite thing to do in your spare time?” Have a think about your go-to first question. How could you tweak it to set a better tone and direction for the conversation that follows? 5. Share your stories too Good conversation finds the balance between active listening and proactive sharing. If you’re asking meaningful questions that invite people to share more of who they are, then you have to be willing to go there too! If you hold back, then the conversation isn’t balanced and this can impact the level of trust you feel between you. So make sure you give of yourself. Share your stories and your experiences. Be prepared to be vulnerable [if the situation creates this opportunity]. Sharing your rawness and realness is one of the quickest way to deepen your connection and build friendships and bonds that make your life all the better for having them. 6. Move beyond small talk into something more meaningful What happens when you’re in a room with people you don’t know? Where small talk breaks the ice, it won’t helps you cultivate the type of relationships that might actually go somewhere. That’s because small talk keeps conversation at those safe, surface level topics. You know the kind… where you talk about the weather or the performance of your favorite sporting hero! These types of conversations may help pass the time or help you feel more comfortable in new social settings. But stick to the surface and you’ll never get to know the person you’re speaking with. If you truly want to get to know someone, you need to find out how they think. What motivates and inspires them? What do they care about? What are their dreams and struggles? Talk about something deeper and you can build connections that feel more meaningful and therefore last somewhere. 7. Ask better questions The quality of the questions you ask is going to determine the quality of conversation you have. Ask better questions and you’ll have better conversations - it’s as simple as that. It’s surprising how limited we can be in our chats with other people - both strangers and those we love. It’s easy to stay in our comfort zones and as a result, we build artificial limits around the topics to talk about. In turn, we never explore the wide range of topics that could transform how we share ourselves and how we can feel closer to others. It’s why we created the Icebreaker Deck. This pack of 150 prompt cards gives you a stack of interesting topics to talk about with strangers and with the people you [think you] know the most. Memorize some of these questions so you’re ready to use them at a party, a business event, or even in the line while you’re waiting for your coffee. Alternatively, use them as a game when you’re at home or with friends and family. Simply pull out a card, ask the question, and enjoy learning more about the people close to you. The Icebreaker Deck sparks your curiosity. It provides you with the fuel you need to figure out what makes people tick. It gives you the questions that allow you to discuss emotions, explore thought processes, and talk about your dreams, desires, learning opportunities, and motivations. It’s the tool to keep on your desk and weave into your everyday life so that you can start the conversations that might actually go somewhere. Because the quality of the relationships you build are going to have a profound impact on your life. Build deeper, more meaningful, stronger connections - in all areas of your life, and you’ll get more out of life. Because ultimately, life is all about relationships. Get Your Icebreaker Deck          Some people are naturally good in social settings and conversations. They naturally thrive around people, effortlessly put others at ease, and are skilled at creating the space for connection. Other people find the conversation more tricky. But the good news is, conversation skills can be learned and mastered. And these seven tips plus the Icebreaker Deck will help you talk with anyone. So figure out your plan, invest in your communication skills, and watch how you’re able to influence your ‘five people’ so you can live your best life.

When you’ve got your head down and you’re hustling hard to build your business, it’s easy to let your social wellness fall by the wayside. Maybe you skip dinner with your family to squeeze in “just one more hour” of work on your website. Perhaps you cancel the coffee you’d planned to catch up with an old friend in order to get ahead on tomorrow’s projects. It’s tempting to neglect your relationships with other people in pursuit of business and financial success. Maintaining your relationships as an entrepreneur requires mindfulness and care. After all, what’s the point of building a successful business if it comes at the expense of your connections with other people? To help maintain your connections, it’s valuable to understand the concept of social wellness, a term that mental health professionals use in order to evaluate an individual’s mental health within the broader context of society. What Is Social Wellness? Social wellness refers to the quality and strength of your relationships with others. It comes from having a positive social network. This network includes family, friends, professional contacts and even more casual acquaintances like the barista at your regular coffee place. When your social wellness is high, it means that you have a rich social life and a variety of healthy personal relationships spanning romantic, social and professional contexts. Quantity doesn’t necessarily matter here — someone with fewer, deeper relationships could have a higher degree of social wellness than someone with a larger number of superficial or unhealthy relationships. Why Is Social Wellness Important? Social wellness is crucial for your overall well-being. As the NIH reports, higher levels of social wellness correlate with increased life expectancy and improved health. On the other hand, “loneliness and social isolation are linked to poorer health, depression, and increased risk of early death.” Having a strong support network of people you trust is also important for overcoming adversity. When you have social support, it’s easier to deal with the hard times that accompany the death of a loved one, the failure of a business venture or the pain of an illness. And even in less extreme circumstances, a network of supportive people is helpful for getting through a bad day, a boring job or bouts of self-doubt. 4 Techniques to Cultivate Social Wellness Now that you understand the importance of social wellness, let’s look at some ways you can increase it in your daily life. These aren’t quick fixes, but rather long-term strategies for building a life that is more rich and connected. 1. Prioritize Your Mental Health When we discuss healthcare, we often focus only on conditions that we can clearly see and diagnose. This is a dangerous tendency, as it neglects the fact that mental illnesses are just as serious and debilitating as physical illnesses. Indeed, modern medical science reveals that the traditional dichotomy between the brain and the body is a false one: Our mental health is just as physical as any other part of our body. Knowing this, don’t brush off your emotional health as unimportant, something you can just worry about “later” when you’ve achieved your goals. Not only is neglecting your mental health harmful to overall health and wellness, but it can also damage your ability to achieve those goals to begin with. Just as it’s difficult to perform at optimum levels if you have a physical illness, it is hard to do your best work if you’re struggling with anxiety, depression or other mental health issues. Of course, just as in other forms of illness, there are degrees of severity when it comes to mental health issues. Feeling occasional mild depression or anxiety is something you can overcome through mindfulness, exercise and getting enough sleep, just as a cold or upset stomach are conditions you can treat at home using rest or over the counter medication. In contrast, just as you would go to a doctor about serious chronic pain, so should you seek out professional help if you’re experiencing anxiety so severe it affects your ability to perform daily activities or depression so intense that you can’t get out of bed. 2. Build Healthy Relationships Healthy relationships can mean the difference between a happy, fulfilled life and a dreary one that feels devoid of meaning. You need to surround yourself with the right people who boost your self-esteem and bring you joy while also challenging you to be a better person. These are the sort of people that will make up a support system to get you through adversity. You should seek out these relationships in all spheres of your life, particularly in those where you can exercise a high degree of choice. You can’t always control who your co-workers or neighbors are, but you can decide on the friends you hang out with and the people you date or marry. If people are treating you poorly and reducing your quality of life, then you should stop spending time around them. Instead, seek out new people who treat you the way you deserve to be treated — your mental health will be better for it. 3. Maintain Relationship Balance In addition to filling your life with healthy relationships, you need to maintain proper balance among the various relationships in your life. This keeps your life interesting and varied, while also ensuring that you don’t neglect certain relationships in the pursuit of others. You should ensure balance among your relationships with the following three groups of people: • Family members• Friends• Co-workers If you’re spending a disproportionate amount of time with one group, it can hurt your relationships with the others. There’s no right amount of time, and it depends on your circumstances. The amount of time you spend with family will be wildly different if you have several children and a large extended family than if it’s just you and your spouse. You should also make sure you don’t neglect one other personal relationship, one critical to self-care: the relationship you have with yourself. You need to have time alone to reflect and rest apart from the time you spend with others. Of course, how much time you need depends on whether you're an introvert or an extrovert, but all of us need some time alone in order to maintain our mental health. 4. Practice Self-Disclosure Self-disclosure is a term in psychology that refers to “a process of communication by which one person reveals information about himself or herself to another.” In more colloquial terms, we often call it opening up or getting deep. This process is key to building the trust that forms the basis for meaningful relationships. If you’re struggling to forge deep connections that go beyond the surface, then self-disclosure is an important step to take. We’re not saying you have to tell your deepest secrets to someone the first time you meet them; this can be inappropriate and make you come off as intense. But with time, self-disclosure is the route to creating the supportive relationships necessary for a happier, adversity-resistant life. If you struggle with with self-disclosure, here are some things you can share: • Thoughts• Feelings• Aspirations• Goals• Failures• Successes• Fears• Dreams• Likes• Dislikes• Favorites Build Social Wellness for Life A strong social network will lead to a life that is happier and more resilient, not to mention improves your health and longevity. Social wellness isn’t something you can achieve instantly, but it is something that’s worth the effort to pursue.

When you’ve got your head down and are hard at work reaching your entrepreneurial goals, it’s easy to lose sight of what’s important. Maybe a project doesn’t go as you would like, a client runs out of money and can’t pay you, or your website gets hacked. These situations are frustrating, but in the grand scheme of things, they are minor compared to all the things you have to be grateful for. The simple act of feeling and expressing gratitude is powerful. It not only helps you improve your mental well-being; research has shown that it can improve your physical health as well. Despite the benefits, however, it can be hard to make time for gratitude in your daily routine. To help you start practicing gratitude today, we present the following quotes about gratitude from renowned politicians, scientists, philosophers, and more. 1. Giving Thanks to Those Who Have Helped You “We must find time to stop and thank the people who make a difference in our lives.” - John F. Kennedy Even if you work for yourself and by yourself, you cannot succeed without the help of others. Whether it’s a mentor who gave you feedback on your first business idea, the first client who took a chance by hiring you, or the parents who encouraged you as a kid, you have someone to thank for where you are today (and where you’re headed). So, take a moment today to send a quick email, text, or message expressing your highest appreciation to one of the people who has helped you out on your entrepreneurial journey. For another expression of the importance of being thankful for the people who have helped you, see how Marcel Proust put it:  "Let us be grateful to the people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom." 2. The Importance of Expressing Gratitude “Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” - William Arthur Ward While there is great power in just writing down what you’re grateful for in your journal, it’s even more powerful to express your gratitude in a public form. This doesn’t mean you have to post constantly to Facebook about how #blessed you are. But you could apply the idea to an annual post on your blog about the things you’re grateful for. Or you could send all your clients (or employees) a yearly holiday card thanking them for working with you. Whatever way you choose, don’t let gratitude stay within you; let it out. 3. Be Thankful for What You Have “Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” - Oprah Winfrey Setting goals is crucial to growing your business and getting what you want out of life. But if you focus too much on your aspirations (especially financial ones), you run the risk of being perpetually unhappy. It’s not wrong to want more, but it’s also important to remember that you already have great abundance. Oprah’s quote reminds us of the value of being happy with what we already have, even as we continue to improve ourselves and pursue ambitious goals. Or, as Brian Tracy puts it, "Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation." 4. Gratitude Is the Greatest Virtue “Gratitude is not only the greatest of virtues but the parent of all others.” - Marcus Tullius Cicero While this may sound like a bold statement, it’s also true. If you want to be happy, generous, kind, or whatever other virtues you aspire to, gratitude unlocks the path to reaching them. Take generosity, for example. When you’re grateful for what you already have, then it’s much easier to give your money or time without fear of loss, since you recognize the great abundance already in your life. 5. Gratitude Is True Prosperity “Gratitude for the present moment and the fullness of life now is the true prosperity.” - Eckhart Tolle When we hear the word “prosperity”, maybe we imagine having lots of money, or a beautiful house, or even a large family. These are all nice things to have, certainly, but this quote reminds us that when we’re present in this moment, and grateful for the gift that is life itself, we can reach a form of prosperity that doesn’t require material abundance. As Maya Angelou also wisely put it, "This a wonderful day. I’ve never seen this one before." 6. Gratitude Transforms “Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity… it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” - Melody Beattie When we practice gratitude, we can transform not only our present lives, but also our relationship with the past and our plans for the future. As we’ll explore in the next quote, all the things that have happened in your past have come together to bring you to where you are today. Not all of those experiences were positive, but each had a role in shaping who you are now. 7. You Are the Sum of Your Experiences “Cultivate the habit of being grateful for every good thing that comes to you, and give thanks continuously. And because all things have contributed to your advancement, you should include all things in your gratitude.” - Ralph Waldo Emerson This quote reminds us to pay attention to the little things in life. It’s easy to be excited when you hit a major business milestone, make your first sale, or receive a glowing review from a client. But it’s not as easy to see the smaller reasons for gratitude that come between the big successes: the sunny day that puts you in a good mood, the coffee you drink each morning, or the routine jobs you do each day to make the rest of your business run. As Robert Brault put it, "Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things." 8. Life Is a Miracle “There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” - Albert Einstein To have a chance to live life at all is pretty amazing, if you think about it. The odds of being born are actually quite small, and the odds of you specifically existing are even smaller. Add to that the many advantages you already have that are allowing you to read this article at all, and there’s even more cause for extreme gratitude. You can, as Einstein says, also choose to view it the other way (that nothing is a miracle), but we think he would agree that life is a lot more spectacular if you choose to see the everyday as miraculous. 9.  Don’t Take Things for Granted “When it comes to life the critical thing is whether you take things for granted or take them with gratitude.” - G.K. Chesterton Einstein and Chesterton might seem very different on the surface (the former was a physicist, the letter a theologian and author), but they seemed to agree on the importance of gratitude. Chesterton’s statement is a pithy, memorable encapsulation of how gratitude is ultimately a choice. Life is going to throw lots of challenges your way , but the choice to accept these challenges with gratitude rests with you. Or as Brené Brown put it, "What separates privilege from entitlement is gratitude." 10. Gratitude Reinforces Itself “The more you recognize and express gratitude for the things you have, the more things you will have to express gratitude for.” - Zig Ziglar This quote shows how gratitude is a virtuous cycle. The practice of being grateful opens your eyes to how many other causes there are for gratitude. For example, you might start with being grateful for your friends. From there, you remember the school where you met and the teacher you had who encouraged you to take an unconventional path. And so on and so forth, with the gratitude building on itself. 11. Health Is Cause for Gratitude "Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship." - Buddha This final life quote from one of the most legendary wise men of all time is a fitting conclusion to our list, for it reminds us that we should be grateful for our health. Good health is easy to take for granted, but it's the foundation for most of the things we want to achieve. Even if it feels like nothing else is going your way, remember that seemingly small things like good health are reasons to be grateful. Cultivate Gratitude Always We hope these inspirational quotes have helped you see that no matter what you’re going through right now in your business or in your life, you still have a lot to be grateful for. With gratitude as your foundation, you can go forward in your pursuits with less fear and more joy, knowing that your life is already full of abundance. Other quote articles you might like… 15 Quotes About Forgiveness That Can Set You Free 40 Intimacy Quotes That Will Leave You Feeling More Connected 18 Entrepreneur Quotes To Keep You Motivated 10 Mindfulness Quotes To Improve Happiness & Eliminate Stress 50 Quotes That Inspire You To Think Bigger, Achieve More, and Enjoy Today