My ADHD Brain's Secret Weapon for Snow Days & Family Chaos: Systems!
Writing this from an unexpected snow day in Austin, juggling work calls and a toddler transforming blankets into capes, I'm reminded of a crucial truth: systems are lifelines, especially for parents, and doubly so for those with ADHD.
Between snow days, daycare closures, and the inevitable sick days, maintaining routine can feel impossible. For brains already working hard on executive functions – planning, organizing, task-switching – these disruptions aren't just inconvenient; they can feel like a system crash. My mental RAM constantly feels low, and trying to keep everything in my head inevitably leads to dropped balls.
Last week, we discussed finding connection amidst chaos. Today, let's focus on building the scaffolding that supports those connections: systems that free up precious mental energy. Sometimes, the most productive approach isn't trying harder, but designing frameworks that function even when life (or the weather) throws curveballs.
Family Command Center: 4 Game-Changing Systems for Less Chaos
These systems act as our family's "external brain," significantly reducing mental load and preventing things from slipping through the cracks:
1. Shared Calendar Magic: Our rule: if it isn't on the shared digital calendar, it doesn't exist. This includes appointments, errands, school events, and the necessary prep/travel time (a must for my time-blindness!).
2. The Unified Grocery List: No more relying on one person's memory! We use a shared note app (like Google Keep or Apple Notes). Anyone adds items as they notice we're low. Shopping becomes a simple matter of opening the list.
3. Kid Email Command Center: Create a dedicated email address for each child (e.g., using Gmail). Set up auto-forwarding to both parents' primary inboxes. School newsletters, activity updates, appointment reminders – everything lands in both places automatically. (I star important ones for visibility).
4. The Weekly Sync: A non-negotiable 15-20 minutes each week to align on logistics: pickups, meal plans, upcoming events, support needs, date nights. This brief check-in proactively prevents countless miscommunications. Inspired by our Relationship Journals
Identify Your Biggest RAM Drain
Take 15 minutes today:
1. Identify: What task, responsibility, or piece of information consistently drains your mental energy or gets forgotten?
2. Systemize: Choose ONE system from the list above (or adapt one) that could help manage this drain.
3. Implement: Start small. Set up the shared grocery list, create the kid email forward, or schedule your first weekly sync.
Bonus: Reply and share the system you're trying! Your experience might help others.
🤔 Reflection Prompt
"What's one recurring task you're currently trying to remember that could be transformed into an automated system instead?"
📚 Read: "Order from Chaos" by Jaclyn Paul
Written specifically for parents with ADHD, this book offers life-changing strategies for managing home and work when your brain operates differently.
🔍 Cool Find: Andrew Huberman's "Deep Rest" Protocol/Track
Struggling with middle-of-the-night wake-ups? I recently tried Andrew Huberman's guided breathing technique during a 3 AM wake-up (via Spotify/YouTube) and actually fell back asleep. Another system that helps even when the brain resists!
Here’s to building systems that support us, freeing up mental space for what truly matters, even on the most chaotic days. You're doing better than you think.
Keep going,
Cathryn
