These seemingly small interactions are what renowned relationship expert Dr. John Gottman calls "bids for connection." They happen constantly: a partner mentioning a tough meeting, a friend sharing a small win via text, a colleague recounting a weekend anecdote. Research suggests we encounter about 20 such bids daily – each one a chance to either strengthen or subtly weaken our bonds.
The Surprising Secret to Stronger Relationships
The Gottman Institute's research reveals a striking statistic: couples who consistently acknowledge and respond positively to these small bids are 86% more likely to thrive long-term. Yet, a common challenge reported in our community is feeling disconnected despite spending ample time together.
The insight? Quality trumps quantity. An hour of genuine, focused conversation often builds more lasting connection than several hours of shared, distracted time (like watching a movie while scrolling phones).
(Quick aside: We're gathering insights via a brief 5-minute survey to better serve you. Your input directly shapes future tools and resources!)
Set an alarm on your phone for sometime tomorrow (e.g., 2 PM). When it rings, pause your current activity and make one intentional bid for connection. Text a friend, call a family member, or ask your partner a specific question about their day ("How did that presentation go?" is more effective than a generic "How was your day?").
📚 Reading Corner: "Atlas of the Heart" by Brené Brown
🎧 Listen: "The Power of Tiny Interactions" (Hidden Brain podcast)
